The hypocrisy of parents and the society on the fight against rape, by Musa Gambo


Its might seems confusing, but certainly not to people speaking from personal experiences, the stigma imposed on rape victims in our societies today, is far greater than ever.

As from the moment a woman is raped, she automatically lost about 90 percent chances of her getting married in that neighborhood, and that and #39;s not all as its comes with an unwanted ticket of becoming a life time subject of discussion.

Indeed we might not all be guilty of rape as a society, but no doubts we are solely responsible for providing the comfortable environment for the perverted idiots perpetrators of rape, to continue their normal life which gives them a signal that they have done nothing seriously wrong at all.

While we stigmatized the victims with all sorts of nonsense and putting back the blame on them for several stupid reasons such as dressing or staying late at nights, this usually force them into relocation from one place to another.

We must know that the trending hypocrisy of Sharing posters and all sort of social media abracadabra is not the way forward, and is surely not the solution to our problem.

We must also as a society recognize and make it clear that no perpetrator of rape deserve our help and respect, and henceforth any lunatic irresponsible enough to commit rape would not be treated as usual but accordingly, and be ready to accommodate the victims of rape and match our words with actions in accepting them and sharing their grieve that what happened is not their fault and we do not hate, dislike or laugh at them for it, we must learned to stop judging victims and putting the villains in their places accordingly.

If our environment can be made uncomfortable for victims then why can't it be worse as hell for it master minders.

About four years ago in Damaturu, one of our well respected senior brother and his niegbours caught a man who raped a girl in a bright day light during the month of Ramadan.

They struggled so hard before handing him over to the police, and with so much pressure the girl was taking to the hospital and eventually confirmed that she was indeed raped, but all their efforts went in vain as the girl parents have claim the rapist as a family member.

These makes the issue a family affair, which automatically turn the table upside down as the parent are now the ones protecting the perpetrator, the girl was eventually relocated to gaidam in other to alter the course of justice.

They continue pushing on the case with that until the person was taking to the court amidst so many difficulties.

But the man was later released to come back and continue his life in the same area.

Similarly last year, an old man was caught raping his granddaughter here in Damaturu, but he was eventually released and walked due to some lack of evidence or something like that.

But the point is the matter went down because it was considered a family thing, and such is the magnitude of the hypocrisy of most parents, the excuses are usually that if this goes public my daughter would not get married, and to some extent the story has some origin to be honest asked around how many people can marry a rape victim.

And that is why many girls were been raped in silence and they could' t speak out even in their own house, they kept it all to them self because they feel insecure and not sure of what would follow.

How even their own family members and particularly the hypocritical society would treat and look at them again, yes there are many like that and the society is doing nothing more than sharing online posters about it, this is just a tip out of the many stories around our society today.

Ask about the victims of Boko Haram rape especially those who accidentally became pregnant due to the rape, or the ones kidnapped and impregnated by them, Yes, they suffer allot of trauma really, but the most difficult and disgusting of all it, is the injustice of our stigmatization as society.

I do not approve of indecent dressing, but I refuse to agree that it is the sole cause of rape, and i do not agree that walking alone, asking for help or keeping Males Company is the problem causing rape here.

Rape is a pure in humanity and lack of home training and the curves is going higher because the society allows it perpetrators to live happily after, while murdering its victims alive.

We are still talking about rape today because some parents took ownership of their children rape perpetrators and keep them safe.

Rape is going high because we are not ready to marry the victims of rape, but we are marrying the perpetrators of rape.

Rape is still a measure problem in our societies because we have made its very uncomfortable for our victims to speak it out.

I do not support the idea of the Senate bill of castration either, but I believe they deserve life imprisonment.

Victims of rape would never have peace and broke free of their trauma, if they would still come out to market or school and see the very people who raped them walking freely in their neighborhood.

Those kinds of irresponsible people belongs in our prisons for life not in our streets, they have lost their dignity as humans the moment they rape someone.

If we truly want to solve this problem, we must also revisit our foundations as a society on how we up bring our children.

The girl child would be thought everything about marriage and taking care of home right from playing with her toys as her children, and then to the kitchen and house chores as she grows up.

But what of the boy and #39;s? Who is teaching all that to them?

So we must devise same way for the boys just like the girl child. Because what and #39; s happening now is exactly what the society has thought them.

Let’s change our mindset toward victim and #39;s of rape and its perpetrators.

On the issues of rape our actions and words do not match and that is hypocrisy.

We must change the narration of our story properly.

JCI Nigeria Ambassador, Musa Gambo, President, JCI EL-KANEMI +2347036478990 Maiduguri, Nigeria.


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