My journey to fatherhood, by Haruna A. Yusuf

My journey to fatherhood, by Haruna A. Yusuf

The years 2001-2007 were very good years for me as an independent Tv producer who specializes in producing Television documentaries, advertisements, and other Television contents. During those years, there was a boom in my business, as my services were in high demand by government agencies, cooperate organisations and some politicians. Therefore, the need to save some of the proceeds of my business came to mind and the thought of using one of the leading old-generation banks was very clear so I decided to open a Bank account with one of the old generation banks.

I was enjoying their services except that the daily crowd in most of the branches was always unbearable thus I began a search for a branch with a lesser crowd. Luckily I found one around the Maitama district in Abuja and on one of my visits to the cosy and crowd-free branch, my eyes came across a beautiful young lady who was in her late 20s and with a dress that depicts that of an ideal Muslim lady. Being a Muslim myself I knew the discipline Involved with a Muslim lady maintaining such an Islamic code of dressing, so I got attracted to doing my financial transaction with her, and all my transactions were satisfactory.
I kept doing my banking transaction in the same branch and with the same lady up till early 2009 when I began to nurse the idea of getting a spouse. The need to examine most of the female friends I had then came to mind including the young lady banker.
There was an incredible experience I recalled with her during one of my visits to the bank that came to my mind. I went to the bank with a cheque to withdraw some amount from my account, standing before my usual lady Teller, she said to me “Sorry, the bank has a problem with its Network facility, we can’t make this transaction right now”. Seeing the way I was worried, she repeated, “Sorry you can’t cash this money now”. So, I decided to personalise the transaction by asking her to lend me the sum of money written on the cheque from her private account and she obliged. I then handed over my cheque to her and told her to pay into her account and in place of the one she lent me when the Network problem was resolved. Then I requested her Mobile number so that I could call to confirm if she was able to cash the money. The gesture saved me lots of problems that day.

So when I was thinking of taking a wife, I interpreted the above incident that the lady in question must have possessed the quality of being ‘considerate’, thus I decided to seek her hand in a relationship with the intention that it may lead to marriage, which eventually did. To date, (12 years later,) I still consider myself lucky to have married such a beautiful, courageous, and supportive woman.

Now the crux of the matter is, we got married on 18th December 2010, and we were all happy we did. But during the period of my honeymoon, I had a dream and in the dream, I saw the car I was using then parked close to the house I was living and a mechanic opened the bonnet and began to lose the engine, I couldn’t say a word except for my father-in-law who was furiously asking the mechanic why he was loosening the engine of the car, but the mechanic did not respond and then I woke up.

Right there, I knew that was a problem but I could not figure out the meaning. I have a gift of dreaming and the ability to interpret dreams, but I could not interpret this one so I consulted the Imam (Muslim cleric) that was leading us in prayers in the mosque to help interpret the dream. He said, “Seeing your car in a dream in the manner you saw it, could mean that you are going to have problems with your wife and your father-in-law will intervene. And the mechanic you saw, was an enemy. In other words, the enemy has attacked you spiritually so go and pray” he concluded.

I left the cleric with the feeling of confusion and not knowing what the future held exactly, so I increased my efforts to provide for the daily need of the household and also increased my prayers and watched how life was unfolding. As the years went by I began to notice a decline in my business and even in my bedroom activities. Hope is always dashed as every monthly cycle comes with great disappointment.

Scandalmongers amongst friends and families were having their filled day as our delay in conception has provided them with something to peddle around. Note that the delay caused us a lot of emotional pain as most of the information they peddled was inaccurate and most times was damaging to our personalities. However, few individuals were sympathetic to our plight and they occasionally recommended hospitals and even gynaecologists who carry out tests and recommended supplements.

Less I forget, I have a wonderful and loving man as a Father-In-law. At some point he began to ask questions about the delay in conception, he did not just stop at asking questions alone but was committed morally and financially to ensuring that we were successful in our quest.
This now reminded me of the first dream I had in the past and his intervention reinforced the meaning of the dream. At this point, I need to say that I owe him profound respect.

Fast forward to 2021, which marked my journey to fatherhood after 11 years of marriage. That year, I had a dream again and this time around I was able to interpret it accurately. In the dream, I saw another brand of car I was using develop a fault, so I parked it and tried to fix it. Suddenly a helper came and asked me “what is wrong with the car” I told him its faulty so he gave me a fuse to fix, and when I fixed it, the vehicle began to work again, then I woke up. I knew that my wife and I had received divine healing and I prayed about it and carried on with my life.

The cycles of January 2022, marked the beginning of our 12 years in marriage which brought us renewed hope as my wife decided to use pregnancy test kits to confirm the reason for her missed period and it came up positive. We were joyfully overwhelmed.

She carried the pregnancy till 22nd September, 2022, when she delivered a bouncing baby boy.

Any lessons learnt?

Yes, I have learnt that victory comes from God. When there’s life, there’s hope. And again, no matter the challenges that greet you now, the virtues of calmness and being focused can enhance your chances of overcoming the troubles that life throws at you. Lastly, you will become mysterious in the face of the tales tellers if you learn to use what they say about you to build a fortress around yourself so that when you overcome, they will be the first to sing your praises because they do not know where your strength lies.

Haruna A Yusuf is a developmental and solution journalist. You can contact him at yusufadoiza10@gmail.com