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Surviving the Nightmare: A harrowing account of bullying and abuse in public boarding schools (I)
On This week’s episode of NP’s Family Dynamics, an anonymous student shared his horrible experience when he was at boarding school. Read, reflect and make better decisions for your wards.
“Dear Sis Eesher, bullying is more intense in public boarding school, as compared to day and private schools. While I was in my school, there were students who engaged in homosexuals activities. They would force themselves on the juniors, and instill in them the fear of reporting it. Even when one gather the courage to report, no serious attention would be given, especially if the senior is from a wealthy background.
The first day I stepped my foot into the boarding school, everything looks interesting and cool. My problems started immediately my parents left. I received a hot slap for not greeting my seniors and also not bringing my provisions for them to feasts on. They beat the hell out of me, and a car was drawn on the wall, and I was asked to push the car. I pushed the drawing while shedding tears. They took my food stuff and provisions.
I was made to fetch water thorough out the day, since it was a Saturday. My uniforms and shoes were stolen before the next day. I had to also steal someone’s else’s uniform too to survive.
I was surviving on two slices of bread and pap that was given at the dinning hall in the morning, and a half-cooked beans in the afternoon and Eba and watery okra soups with dead cockroaches were given sometimes in the evening. You have no option than to pick out the cockroaches and eat the food. The food portion is too meagre, but one have no option but to eat. Complaining would attract punishment, and one will be reminded that it’s a government school, they are just managing the little the government provided. This is a school that has graduated members of House of Representatives, The Governor of the state and some popular musicians.
The school hostel is so rough and dilapidated. Sometimes, I hide inside the ceiling so as to escape from morning functions where we were made to cut grasses, wash the dirty toilets and sweep the school and hostel compounds. In the morning around 5am after the Muslims observed their prayers, everyone assembles at the Basket ball coat. There is another form of bullying there. Seniors will ask one to lie on the basketball ring. A senior student once made me lie on the floor, and by Allah, I was flogged thirty lashes on the buttocks. I cried, as the pain I felt was out of this world. This is what made me to start hiding in the ceiling to avoid the morning activities.
READ ALSO: Handwriting features of bullying students, by Professor Ikechukwu Benjamin Ezeohagwu
The hiding too would incur punishment. Attendance is always taken at the basket ball coat and the small school mosque. If one is absent, there will also be another form of punishment. But I prefer the absentee punishment, than the one at the Basket ball court. You just can’t miss prayers or the morning function and go scott free.
A senior will give you 50 naira to buy him a good worth two hundred naira, and still expect you to bring change. One would have to use his money to make the purchase, and also make sure there’s a change to give the senior to avoid being beaten.
I recall one sad incidence after night prep, when we were summoned for another roll call around 12-1am. A bell will be rang and we will come out from our bunks. We will be shown two places with a hand: heaven and hell. If you have provisions like garri, groundnuts, milk, bournvita, sugar, biscuits, and kulikuli, you should go to the right hand side (heaven) and if you don’t have, go the left (hell). I joined the hell gang, because I didn’t want to give them my provision. When the beating becomes too much, I had to agree I that I have provisions to give them.
Some senior students do inhale faeces to get high, it was said to have cocaine like effects. With this, they’ll have the courage of being wicked to junior students without pity. There were times that one would be woken up and beaten for no reasons. You’ll be made to wash clothes and plates for seniors. During inspections on Saturdays, you would do all the works for your seniors and you’re expected to still thank them for helping your life.
Some boarding school students don’t take their religion seriously; some don’t even pray especially when they become seniors and power is in their hands. In my school, power is handed over to SS 2 students at the second term, and they would start beating students from that day on and no one would stop them.
They would even fight the SS3 students who handed over the power to them because they felt they were also bullied by the them when they were in power. And if your school father is a bully, be ready to be bullied too when he leaves the school or you better change school too. It’s a continuous process. You dare not walk in with your shoes to SS2 or SS3 block. You would have to remove the shoes and walk barefooted. If not, you would be beaten mercilessly.
The horrible experiences leaves one with everlasting marks, just like how mine is still hunting me till date. Know that a male boarding school students is likely to become attracted to the the male gender than the female gender. It took me time and a lot of effort to be able to communicate freely with girls.
I was more comfortable discussing my personal life with the guys. I freaked out when approaching a woman. I think it’s a disorder, which was coupled with insomnia that I got from the boarding school. I’m still trying to heal from all those psychological traumas.
When I started, there’s this senior who was coming after me, saying he like me. He insisted that I should be his school son which I refused, but he forced himself to be my school father. For the fear of being bullied, I agreed to be his school son. At midnight after night prep and we’re back to the dormitory, it’s usually dark, I would feel someone touching me with his genitals, and I would hit him with my hands. I kept wondering who was doing that until when he started forcing himself into me. He would wait until everyone has left the hostel and would try to kiss me and I would protest. There was a day he even tried to have his way into my anus and I fought him with all my strength. He told me so and so seniors are doing it with their school sons and they are enjoying it, that I should better stay calm and let’s do it. I would refuse and he would beat me mercilessly.
Sometimes, he would punish me by making me wash all his clothes; both clean and dirty ones, and I would go and fetch water for him too. He would collect all my food stuff and I would starve. Even if I collect food from the dining hall, he would collect it, except on rare occasions. I can’t report him to the school authority because they would do nothing serious. The house master doesn’t even care, he’s so concerned about his business. I also can’t report my school father to his colleagues because they won’t do anything. A senior can’t harass a fellow senior in the school, so what do I do?
I started sleeping outside the hostel and ended up missing classes in the morning. There was a time I was seriously sick and I requested to go home for proper treatment because the school has very poor medical facilities. In fact, there’s no hospital there, you’re only given paracetamol when you’re having a fever. Waiting for medical treatment in the school will only worsen one’s condition. Some students have died because of this poor health treatment.
When I came back home, I was refusing treatment and I couldn’t tell my parents what was happening. Even if I tell them, they would think I don’t want to stay in the school and they would yell at me. And even if they go to the school, the school authorities would cover everything up and make them feel like everything is good.
Since the school is a public school and accepts exchange students from many states like Kaduna, Kano, Plateau, Lagos, Zamfara, Sokoto and many more. We exchange students face discrimination among teachers and even indigenous students in times of feeding and caring. As an exchange student, you can’t be the Head Boy of the school no matter how intelligent you’re. You can only become an exchange Head Boy. Sometimes, they would insult you in the assembly hall that your government isn’t sending money and there’s no food for you or sometimes, other students call you “ Hausa Akuya or nama (meat) just because you’re not an Indigene of that state. After getting better,I refused to go back to school, I pretended I was still sick. But, later, my parents discovered and sent me back to school and the bullying continued. I only got to be free when my seniors graduated.
In boarding school, whether boys or females, you find cases of homosexuals or Lesbianism. No doubt about this and I can defend this anywhere.
Drugs and cultism are two things you will find amongst building school students. It’s not easy, but when a child doesn’t get spoiled in boarding school, he will surely be good and survive all the intricacies of life.
I remember a night when I was in SS1, a senior woke us up in the middle of the night around 2am to worship him as the god in the school hostel. We refused but it wasn’t easy. Others had to prostrate and worship him but we that refused nearly lost our lives with beating. I’m sure he had taken some drugs then. He was just a bully that has no pity. In the morning, we’ve already dropped later to the principal through the report box as everyone was scared to be seen by that bully. The school never did anything serious to that senior, they only warned him in the assembly ground and that was all. He’s from a wealthy home, what do you expect? Probably a cultist too!
I swear, I have been badly bullied in boarding school and my pen can’t write at all. It’s too much to say. Imagine your fellow man forcing his manhood into your anus.”
To be continued…..
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