NP’s Family Dynamics with Eesher: The unseen hero who sacrificed his dreams to build his siblings’ futures
On today’s episode of NP’S Family Dynamics with Eesher, a brother shared a heart touching and heartbreaking story with us, which was inspired by the picture above.
“Dear Sis Eesher, your post on the lawyer and his dad reminded me of my siblings, coincidentally one is also a lawyer. Our father died and left me with 6 younger siblings, 3 girls, 3 boys.
I finished my secondary school 1998, and at that time, it’s difficult to start University fresh out of secondary, so I followed the diploma route. When I finished, I got admission into 200 level, University. After registration, my father died.
I didn’t deceived myself, I know I can’t afford to study without my dad financing it. And eventhough my father spent his last kobo on his siblings, I did not expect them to support me.
And who will feed my mum and the siblings?
As a son of a deceased civil servant, I know my boundaries, so I quickly secured a job at a sachet water factory. Weeks later, I was appointed as the manager, so I comfortably took care of my dependants.
After 2yrs, in Abuja. I bought my first car and improved the standard of living for my dependants. I withheld getting marriage, and getting a degree, just so I can take good care of them.
I married out my sisters. I sponsored the education of the boys till the 3 of them graduated. It was after I’m done with them that I got married, and obtained my BSc and a Masters at a close interval.
Before I went back to school, all the three boys that I sponsored till University were telling people that I am the only illiterate among them. That I’m the only one with a diploma, not degree. So I relate this your post with my personal experience. I left university just to take them to the university, but they looked down on me.”
Dear Anonymous,
Your story is both inspiring and poignant. It potrays strength, selflessness, and determination. Taking on such a huge responsibility at such a young age, you not only became a provider but also a father figure to your siblings. It’s clear you made tremendous sacrifices—putting your own education and personal aspirations on hold—so your siblings could have a chance to succeed.
The fact that your siblings, whom you supported and empowered, ended up dismissing your sacrifices and achievements, is painful. It’s disappointing how sometimes people fail to appreciate the efforts of those who lifted them up. You weren’t just supporting their education; you were building their future. To belittle your accomplishments is to forget the foundation you provided.
I very much applaud your perseverance in going back to obtain your degree and furthering your education despite all that transpired. It shows tenacy andresilience. It’s a reminder that true education is not just about acquiring degrees but also about having the wisdom, patience, and compassion to make choices that benefit others.
I hope that, with time, your siblings come to fully understand and appreciate all that you’ve done for them. Regardless of how they view it, your legacy is not in their words but in the lives you’ve transformed. May Allah reward your efforts and sacrifice, here and here after.
With love, Sis Eesher
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