Do spouses complete or complement each other? by Aisha M Auyo
Perhaps, it’s mere misappropriation of the word ‘complete’ in relation to marriage. There’s this popular belief that going into marriage makes one be complete. It’s one area that most couples have gotten wrong. We can probably blame our movies and fairytales for most of it.
It makes a great storyline that someone can come into your life and complete you. The problem is, you are a complete person, perfectly created by Allaah with or without someone else in your life.
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If you have perceived lacks and weaknesses you need to be seeking Allaah, your Creator alone to help you fill those spaces and not another person. As long as you feel like you must have another human to complete you, then you are a danger to them and yourself.
No one within themselves can fill you with everything you need. You will just drain your spouse with unrealistic expectations and when you finally discover that they cannot provide all that you need then you will become discontented and frustrated.
You will begin to think that maybe you made a mistake picking your spouse and this in turn can potentially tear you two apart.
Now if you begin to put your spouse in proper perspective realizing that Allaah allowed you two to come together and complement one another with each other’s unique characteristics and strengths, then you can learn to appreciate your spouse without draining them.
Learning how to lighten the relationship with each other’s talents and abilities, enhances and improves your lives together. This is not always the easiest key to understand and embrace, but as you figure it out, it will allow much of the tension in your home to drain away.
