Self-Kindness, the ultimate investment here and hereafter, by Aisha Musa Auyo
I preach kindness every now and then, kindness to a spouse, kids, parents, relatives, and others in our lives. But today, I want to dwell on the most crucial kindness… kindness to oneself.
This is a kindness that goes beyond this dunya (this world); a kindness that rewards you with the best of here and the hereafter. Being kind to oneself has many faces, but I’ll discuss the most important ones here:
1. Prioritising the Akhirah Over the Dunya
This world is merely a temporary place. Try as much as you can to resist the temptation of indulging in sins. Strive to stop any act that you would not love to die doing. Stop procrastinating regarding good deeds. We do not know when our lives will end; no one gives us notice. We owe ourselves this profound kindness: Preparing for the inevitable.
2. The Investment of Sadaqah (Charity)
Giving out sadaqah, even if it’s merely half a date, expiates sins and prevents tragedy. We often spend so much on ourselves without calculation, yet when it comes to giving to others, we hold back and start calculating. What we forget is that whatever we give out is multiplied and comes back to us many times over. Whatever we spend only on ourselves ends here.
But you see, when we make other people’s lives easier, lessen their burden, or make them feel better, Allah multiplies that, and the reward is for both here and the hereafter. So, whenever we spend on ourselves, let’s try to include the less privileged. We are not only helping others; we are being incredibly kind to ourselves beyond this dunya.
READ ALSO: Don’t postpone kindness, you may never get another chance (2), by Aisha Musa Auyo
3. The Perpetual Reward of Sadaqah Jariyah (Ongoing Charity)
Let’s discuss Sadaqah Jariyah… a charity, in which the reward continues to reach you even after your death. We can achieve this through many means: Investing in raising pious children, teaching the Quran or good deeds, drilling a source of water, contributing to an Islamic school or any good cause, even if we can’t afford to sponsor it entirely, planting trees, etc.
We benefit more from this benevolence than the people we did it for. We truly owe this type of kindness to ourselves.
4. Cultivating Great Relationships
Cultivating good relationships with others, elevating their mood and ranks, making them feel great about themselves, and improving the quality of their lives are powerful ways we can be kind to ourselves. These are the investments that make people miss us and sincerely pray for us after our demise. We owe this kindness to ourselves—being able to invoke the feeling of longing, missing, and praying for us when we are no longer here.
5. Sustaining Spiritual Well-being;
Keeping our mouth moist with Zikr (remembrance of Allah), Istighfar (seeking forgiveness), and Salawat (blessings upon the Prophet), reading the Quran, and constantly upgrading our knowledge and practice of our Deen (religion) is a kindness to self that we should never compromise.
6. Integrity and Truthfulness
Saying the truth, having integrity and decency, minding one’s business, and having a halal (lawful) source of income is a profound kindness we owe ourselves, for this will be a shield from the Hellfire.
7. Simple, multiplied deeds;
You see, a simple gesture—smiling at strangers, a kind word, an encouraging nod, removing a harmful object from the road, helping or feeding animals, or watering a plant—will go a long way in benefiting us here and hereafter.
Angels are praying to Allah that whoever gives out, may Allah increase his wealth, and whoever withholds his wealth, may Allah withhold His blessings from him. So we should always remember that whatever we do, small or big, we shall receive it in multiples.
8. Being Intentional;
One crucial thing I’d like to remind us here is to be intentional about everything we do. Let’s always ensure our deeds and acts, big or small, are about getting rewarded by our Creator.
Let every action or inaction emanate from the craving for Allah’s Rahma (Mercy) and the fear of His punishment. This, indeed, is the biggest kindness we owe ourselves.
Aisha Musa Auyo is a Doctorate researcher in Educational Psychology. A wife, a mother, a homemaker, caterer, parenting, and relationship coach. She can be reached via aishamuauyo@live.co.uk.
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